CHRISTMAS CARDS, done right. Irish style.1. This accurate description of Christmas dinner Source: twisteddoodles2. This heartwarming seasonal message Source: Jarlath Regan3. This traditional pastime Source: Noelle Healy4. This truthful greeting Source: Ambivalent Cards5. This simply obscene arse Source: Conor Moore Illustration6. This perfect summary of the holiday season… and afterwards Source: Eoin Whelehan/Designist7. This Dublin Christmas Carol Source: twisteddoodles8. This rather beautiful Stephen’s Green scene Source: Ursula Celano9. This honest and fair expression of affection Source: Ambivalent Cards10. This essential seasonal swatch Source: Designist11. This important annual ritual Source: Noelle Healy12. These youngsters setting up the tree Source: Ursula Celano13. This frighteningly valid message Source: Jarlath Regan14. This defensive robin Source: twisteddoodles15. These rather lovely Dublin landmarks Source: Clover Rua16. And this Christmas love song. Source: Stephen Heffernan/DesignistThe source for each card is in the link underneath. Cards from Designist are not available online, but in store on Georges Street, Dublin.14 very Irish Christmas present ideas>The 16 absolute greatest Christmas jumpers of 2013>
Click here for larger versionINDIA’S PRIME MINISTER in the early 1980s sent “warm greetings” to Taoiseach Garrett Fitzgerald as she flew over Shannon.Gandhi was the only woman to hold the office of Prime Minister in India and the second longest-serving leader. She was assassinated by her two bodyguards in 1984.In correspondence to the Taoiseach as she passed overhead, she also sent good wishes to “the friendly people” of Ireland.Isn’t that nice?See National Archives Reference 2013/100/440.Read: Kenny jets to Japan for five day visit aimed at building closer economic ties>
NEW YORK CONGRESSMAN Michael Grimm doesn’t like being asked about his campaign finances.After last night’s State of the Union address, the Republican from the 11th congressional district of the Empire State was interviewed by his local TV station NY1.After being thrown a couple of softballs by reporter Michael Scotto, Grimm was preparing to wrap up the interview.However, when Scotto attempted to ask him about a federal investigation into his 2010 campaign finances, Grimm stormed off. (Jacob Kornbluh/YouTube)As Scotto summed up the story and attempted to pass back the studio, Grimm came back on screen to physically confront the much smaller Scotto.Grimm, a former US Marine who served in the Gulf War, then threatened Scotto.Let me be clear to you, you ever do that to me again I’ll throw you off this f***ing balcony.As Scotto argues that the question was a valid one, Grimm threatens him again.“No, no, you’re not man enough, you’re not man enough. I’ll break you in half. Like a boy.”No apologiesInstead of contrition, however, Grimm came out swinging following the incident, saying that NY1 had ‘taken a cheap shot’ at him.“I was extremely annoyed because I was doing NY1 a favour.I verbally took the reporter to task and told him off, because I expect a certain level of professionalism and respect, especially when I go out of my way to do that reporter a favour.“I doubt that I am the first Member of Congress to tell off a reporter, and I am sure I won’t be the last.”The station called the incident ‘unacceptable’.Read: A “year of action”: Obama sends warning to Congress, pledges to tackle inequality
While this chart shows that 79% (820) hand hygiene opportunities complied with best practice in the HIQA inspections.Quinn said:No hospital was found to be fully compliant with all of the standards at the time of their individual inspection”Other risks included “drug trolleys not being maintained with best practise guidelines” and “inappropriate accommodation of patients”.Patients were observed on trolleys outside of screened treatment bays in the emergency department and on extra beds placed into ward.The inspections were carried out between November 2012 and December 2013.Only ten of the inspections were announced, while the others were all unannounced. HIQA noted a 20 per cent failure rate even during the announced inspections.“Given that the hospital is informed in advance of announced inspections,it is significant that under these circumstances 20 per cent of observed hand hygiene opportunities were not undertaken and 20 per cent of the observed opportunities that were undertaken did not comply with best practice hand hygiene technique. This finding might suggest that training provided to hospital staff needs to be reviewed,” it said.The only public acute hospital that wasn’t checked was University Hospital Galway as it was the focus of a separate regulatory process by the Authority at the time.HIQA: Poor hand-washing in Irish hospitals potentially putting patients at risk>Ennis Hospital the shining light in poor HIQA hygiene reports> This chart shows the proportion of 1,499 hand hygiene opportunities observed by HIQA in the inspections. NOT WASHING HANDS properly was the biggest problem found by HIQA during their inspections of hospitals last year.Of the 49 hospitals inspected by the Health Information and Quality Authority, 13 were given formal notices of serious risks related to cleanliness.Hand hygiene was the most commonly identified serious risk. Six out of the 13 hospitals were notified about this problem.Phelim Quinn, HIQA’s Director of Regulation, said:Non-compliances with best hand hygiene practice … related to issues such as not taking long enough to perform the hand hygiene technique, not performing the correct hand hygiene technique or wearing a wrist watch, jewellery or long sleeves.
What they are really saying: I’m not actually there yet, but almost there, so you should come out and be at the curb because I’m too lazy to get out of the car. Also, I’m afraid I’ll have to make awkward conversation with your odd housemate again.6. The auntie occasionIt’s your birthday! Christmas! New Year’s! … a Saturday! Lovely aunties love sending texts to let you know they’re thinking of you, but aren’t quit committing to a call. Here’s what you’ll get ten minutes after some great news:What they mean: Your mam tells me EVERYTHING and I eventually want an invite to the wedding.7. Quick apology textSo they’ve made a typo or had an autocorrect disaster and will make it ten times worse by texting you multiple times to correct themselves, each of which are riddled with errors themselves. STOP. It was an accident, we know.What they actually trying to say: Who even knows? We assume it’s, “I can spell, honest”.8. The attention-seeking mistaken numberAh yeah, we know what you’re up to. We’ll respond too because it worked. It works every time. You’re still being judged a bit though.What they meant, was: I couldn’t think of a decent way to text you out of the blue so I guess this is as good as any. I also look generally popular like I just got lost in a flood of responses.9. Sorry I ignored you but I need somethingWe all know how this one goes down, as we’ve been on both sides. Someone texted you an unacceptable amount of time ago to now merit a reply. You originally ignored it but now you open up the conversation to ask them something important and there it is, staring back at your guilt-ridden self. You’ll say:What’s implied: I really didn’t only see this now but I wasn’t arsed replying and I think that deserves to be addressed now that I need your help. Please still help. I’m sorry.10. THE DRUNK TEXTDid you flinch? Did you flinch in actual horror? They’ve had a few shandies and are thinking about you. Aw, nice.NOT. It resembles something like this, except a lot more explicit:What they really mean: I’m going to regret this immensely tomorrow but I’m mad about you and or have failed to find something better in the pub so you’re the next best option.7 mortal dangers of sending a text message>10 ancient texting traumas that are now a thing of the past> YOUR PHONE, WHAT would you do without it? Texts are fast going out of fashion in Ireland but there’ll always be the old reliables.You’re pretty much guaranteed to have received one of these. Here’s what they’re really saying.1. Mammy pryingIt’s Sunday morning and your mam wants to know that you’re still alive after sitting in all night worrying about you and if you were warm enough at that very moment. She’ll send this:What she really means: How drunk were you, reassure me that you actually made it home, and are you too hungover to come visit me?2. Tell me what I did last nightYou woke up with a mouth drier than the sahara and you’ve less than a vague idea how you got home. Did you make a show of yourself? Oh my God, bet you pissed everyone off. Time to put the feelers out and send some casual texts to see what the response is like. You’ll say:You mean: Are you still talking to me and please fill in the blanks, I got nothing.3. The dad dismissalDad has something urgent to tell you but he’s SICK of looking at that tiny little screen when there’s the news to be watched. Tut. He’ll send this.What he really means is: OK, sure, lovely to hear from you. I’ll have a think about it and consult with your mam and we will get back to you ASAP. Don’t go to too much trouble now. Love you, have a nice day xxx Dad4. Subtle conversation starterIf by subtle, they’re going for ‘blatant’, then this is spot on. Usually utilised by the drunken shift you gave your number to last night, it’s always a question and never just a straight-forward hello.What they mean: Is this number actually real and on a scale of no reply to ten, how much do you regret lobbing the gob on me?5. They’re OUTSIDEThey’ve just pulled up outside to pick you up or go in for prinks but GOD FORBID the door would be touched. What if a weirdo opened it? The text?
I wish to pay tribute to the Garda Commissioner, Martin Callinan, on his retirement from An Garda Síochána.As Commissioner and throughout his very distinguished service in the Force he has made an enormous contribution to fighting crime and I believe that this contribution will be seen as a legacy of which he can be very proud and for which the community he served are in his debt.The high reputation of An Garda Síochána has been gained down through the years through people’s experience of dealing with members like Martin Callinan, often at times of great difficulty. I believe, at these challenging times for the Force, the men and women who serve in it will continue to enjoy the respect of the community they serve, often at great risk to themselves.I extend to him my sincere thanks for his dedication and service to the State throughout his long and distinguished career. MINISTER FOR JUSTICE Alan Shatter has paid tribute to Martin Callinan after he stepped down from An Garda Siochána amid increasing controversy.In a statement, Minister Shatter thanked Callinan for his “long and distinguished career” and said that his legacy will be his contribution to fighting crime in Ireland.The Minister made no mention of the circumstances in which Callinan took early retirement, following eight weeks of simmering controversy after he referred to garda whistleblowers as ‘disgusting’. Several government ministers in recent days had called on Callinan to retract and apologise for his remarks.Just hours after Callinan stepped down, the government announced a major investigation into phone calls being taped and recorded at garda stations throughout the country.The Taoiseach told the Dáil this afternoon that he will not ask Minister Shatter to resign over his own remarks on whistleblowers. Enda Kenny said the Minister will speak about the controversy on Thursday.The statement from the Minister for Justice reads: Profile: Who is the new Acting Commissioner of An Garda Síochána? >In full: Martin Callinan’s statement on his decision to resign > Read: This isn’t the first time illegal recording of Garda station calls has been noted > Catch up: Everything you need to know about GardaGate in one place >